Click here to find out what that bastard on the left is.
In case you haven’t noticed, I have multiple personalities.
When I decide what to do, I give speeches in my head and refer to myself as, “we.” “We need to do this.” “We’re going to do that.” “This is why we need to do this.”
I said, “We’re going to quit smoking.”
And apparently at least one of us doesn’t like that and is throwing a fit. He wanted to throw that fit at work, so I left work before I yelled at someone and perhaps made them cry or forced them to lock me in a closet.
I couldn’t sleep last night more than a couple of hours at a time, so I was exhausted. I thought I would go home, avoid killing anyone on the way, eat some nachos (the food, not Nacho the cat), and get some rest.
While at home, I still managed to irritate a few people.
Then I tried to get some rest.
I couldn’t sleep.
Eventually, I did sleep, for five minutes, and then woke up because I was holding my breath.
This happened a number of times and then I decided that was too freaky to wake up gasping for air.
That little smoke-monkey is just going to hold our breath until he gets his way, eh?
Fine, I’ll play, you little smelly bastard. Hold our breath. See what that gets you.
And now a picture of a beautiful women.
I made up a story that I refer to myself as “we” because I’m an organism and an organism is really just confederation of other organisms… Even the cell is a collection of once-independent little creatures. For instance, the mitochondria was literally a little animal on it’s own.
It’s sounds better that I’m commanding the troops — a bazillion cells — than that I’m giving pep talks to my inner people.
Whenever you have more than two personalities, you’ve got to be a good politician.
Who you callin’ a psycho??
You know what’s kinda sad? I’ve done almost that exact thing, a couple of times — answered questions that people didn’t ask. I didn’t yell, but they definitely were included in conversations that they didn’t know they were having.
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